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Thread: Just a little effort to lighten up the mood of this side of forum

  1. #1
    Passenger BendiT's Avatar
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    Mar 2017
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    Wink Just a little effort to lighten up the mood of this side of forum

    After every flight, pilots fill out a form, called a “gripe sheet” which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems; document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.

    Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers.

    P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
    S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

    P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
    S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

    P: Something loose in cockpit.
    S: Something tightened in cockpit.

    P: Dead bugs on windshield.
    S: Live bugs on back-order.

    P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
    S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

    P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
    S: Evidence removed.

    P: #2 Propeller seeping prop fluid
    S: #2 Propeller seepage normal – #1 #3 and #4 propellers lack normal seepage

    P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
    S: DME volume set to more believable level.

    P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
    S: That’s what they’re for

    P: IFF inoperative.
    S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

    P: Suspected crack in windshield.
    S: Suspect you’re right.

    P: Number 3 engine missing.
    S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

    P: Aircraft handles funny.
    S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

    P: Target radar hums.
    S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics

    P: Mouse in cockpit.
    S: Cat installed.

    And the best one for last.

    P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
    S: Took hammer away from midget.

  2. #2
    Passenger Silvertouran's Avatar
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    " P: Number 3 engine missing.
    S: Engine found on right wing after brief search."

    This one made me laff.
    Canon Powershot SX530 HS (50x Optical zoom)

  3. #3
    Passenger BendiT's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Silvertouran View Post
    " P: Number 3 engine missing.
    S: Engine found on right wing after brief search."

    This one made me laff.
    Haha, it did to me too!

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